The explaining of cancer to a child is not a necessary step to tell the children in detail.
Once your child has been diagnosed with cancer the next difficult aspect is explaining to him that he has this disease.
You may want to shield your child from the knowledge but you do him no good because he is going to sense that something is wrong with him. And since he will be making frequent trips to the hospital and seeing a doctor he will know that he may be ill.
He may also be intuitive enough to feel that you are worried or afraid about something. Some children may feel that they are being punished for some action of theirs.
Someone may let slip that they have cancer and then your child will trust you less for not having given him the information. So it’s best to be upfront and honest and tell him about it otherwise he may get the wrong idea.
It’s difficult to know how to tell a child that he or she has cancer. You must decide if you can do it yourself or if you’d like the doctor or another trusted family member to do it.
Be sure you are present when your child is being told. Make the decision to tell your child soon after the diagnosis is made and before the treatment starts. This way talking about the cancer helps the child understand and cooperate with the treatment.
Knowing what to say is also difficult. It’s best to ask the advice of the doctors, your priest, other family members, or the parents of children with cancer.
At What Age Children With Cancer Should Be Informed?
Prepare in advance what you are going to say and how you are going to explain the facts to your child. This depends a lot on how old your child is and how much he can grasp.
Very young children need not be told anything except that their body is not well and doing something (like taking the treatment or medicines) will help them get better.
Children who are a little older can be given the gist of it (on the lines of good cells fighting bad cells) so that they are not too stressed or worried about the repercussions and comply with the treatment. Be honest with them about the treatment.
Explain in simple words what exactly is going to happen. Don’t hide the fact that there will be pain as with injections. Encourage them to talk about what they are feeling and how the treatment is affecting them.
Teenagers are more in a position to understand what is happening around them so you can be totally honest with them and explain about the cancer and how the treatment is going to help them with their illness.
Let them know it’s a serious disease and that they what they will go through in terms of radiation, chemotherapy or surgery will help to eradicate it. Also, discuss with them the kinds of changes they can expect in their lives and the reactions of people.
Be very sure that you involve your children in what is happening to them and what kind of treatment they will have to undergo. Don’t exaggerate the situation but do be matter of fact when explaining.
Your child will pick up on your attitude and so will not put a wrong interpretation on what is being said to him. If you are open about your child’s cancer with him he will reciprocate and that makes the family become closer at such a difficult time.